Wednesday, May 28, 2008

How Can I Keep from Singing

How Can I Keep from Singing by Chris Tomlin
There is an endless song
Echoes in my soul
I hear the music ring

And though the storms may come
I am holding on
To the rock I cling

How can I keep from singing Your praise
How can I ever say enough
How amazing is Your love
How can I keep from shouting Your name
I know I am loved by the King
And it makes my heart want to sing

I will lift my eyes
In the darkest night
For I know my Savior lives

And I will walk with You
Knowing You'll see me through
And sing the songs You give

I can sing in the troubled times
Sing when I win
I can sing when I lose my step
And fall down again
I can sing 'cause You pick me up
Sing 'cause You're there
I can sing 'cause You hear me, Lord
When I call to You in prayer
I can sing with my last breath
Sing for I know
That I'll sing with the angels
And the saints around the throne

On my way home from work I experienced such an amazing "God moment." Instead of growing more anxious about surgery now less than 48 hours away, I was filled with the most amazing sense of peace and comfort. I felt so full of the Spirit that I thought I was going to have to pull the car over! Now more than ever I know without a shadow of a doubt that God has both my surgery and our adoption in His hands & I can continue to sing because I am loved by the King!

Our journey so far!

Now that the adoption process is officially on the move, John & I wanted to create a blog where the two of us can share our journey with our friends and family! This blog will cover the rollercoaster ride of emotions that come with the process so be prepared for some moments of elation as well as moments of heartache! We hope that as we share this journey we are able to also spread awareness of adoption! I will take just a few moments to share about our journey up to this point.

Our journey to parenthood started over two and a half years ago. In May 2005 John & I married & shared an awesome wedding with our family and friends. From the start of our relationship, God had placed a desire to adopt and we knew that even if we could have our own children that we wanted to adopt at least once. Knowing that I had been diagnosed with endometriosis in 2003, we were aware that time may not be on our side as far as being able to concieve goes. So six months into our marriage, we began trying to conceive a child of our own. Over two years, two surgeries, and countless treatments later, we were informed that it was very unlikely that we would ever be able to have a child of our own without the help of in-vitro fertilization (IVF). It was a tough blow and we wrestled with how to proceed. IVF is expensive and there are no guarentees. After prayer and deliberation, God laid it on both of our hearts to proceed with adoption. We may our final decision on March 18th to move forward and start our adoption journey! Shortly after we made our decision, we were told that I would need a total hysterectomy in order to relieve the pain that had begun to impact all aspects of my daily life. I have begun to grieve the finality that this surgery will bring and while there have been tough days (and many tears), I know that this surgery will allow me to be the type of mother I want to be when our child comes home!

So now we are in the process of selecting an agency and a program. We have opened a money market account to begin saving and I have discovered the wonders of to sell some things that we don't need to help raise funds. We know that it is a long road ahead of us but we are trusting God & we know that where He leads, He provides! As Jeremiah 29:11 reads, "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." And it is in this promise that we place our trust!