When I checked the mail this morning, we had a letter from our agency saying that our homestudy was APPROVED!!! Yay! The end is in sight! Next up will be getting put on the waiting list and having our profile put on the website for potential birthmoms to see! In order to do so, we have got to pay the program fee ($5000) so if you know anyone who would like to buy one of our tshirts, please let us know!
Monday, November 10, 2008
Exactly 12 hours ago we got a call from our agency stating that they had a baby that had just been born this weekend and they thought we were the perfect match. So of John & I of course went crazy trying to get things ready as we were suppose to drive to the agency this morning and meet up with our caseworker before driving to the hospital. We kind of got a muffled voicemail late last night (like midnight) and the only part we could understand was that the mom was having a really hard time. This was confirmed this morning. The mom changed her mind and decided to parent (which in all reality can be a very good thing--even though it may not feel like it). My heart is broken and I feel so empty. I would have never imagine that I could feel so much joy and so much hurt within a 12 hour span. John & I cannot even begin to imagine how much more it would hurt if we had been any more emotionally invovled, as in being matched for several months and then having the mom change her mind. So we are still taking the day off to be together. If anything we now have our crib. Its also a good thing that walmart does returns (now we can take this stuff back and still search for things we love instead of things we just need to have. More than anything, we are so glad to know that God is still in control and He still has a plan. This baby was not the baby that He has chosen to be OUR baby. While it hurts, we feel comfort that only our Father can give. We are also thankful that the call came this morning before we were on the road or even worse, that we had not gotten to see or hold the baby before the mom changed her mind. So we are going to take the day to reflect, cleave to one another, and praise God for being our Comforter, Guide, and Provider and rest in the knowledge that our child is still out there. We continue to appreciate everyone's thoughts and prayers.
Posted by Jamee at 6:35 AM
Friday, November 7, 2008
But I am so loving that it is because we are making progress turning our office/guestroom into a nursery! Holy cow! We have moved our desk/computer downstairs to the living room so its crazy to see that space open knowing that a crib will be there shortly! We still have some stuff in there that we are hoping to sell on Craigslist but hopefully that won't be there too much longer (if anyone is interested in a PB coffee table or dresses let me know! LOL). We are purchasing our crib mattress this weekend. My parents are bringing down our crib at Thanksgiving. Every day I am just amazed at how God is working to make our dream of parenthood a reality! As stores have started pulling out all of the Christmas items it has really hit me that this will truly be our last childless Christmas! We've had the same wishes for the past three years but unless something goes crazy wrong, this is it! We will have a baby Miller by this time next year! Words can't express all of the emotions I am filled with! Psalm 37:4 states "Delight yourself in the LORD; And He will give you the desires of your heart" and I am learning more and more each day how God holds fast to this promise!
Posted by Jamee at 6:46 AM
Saturday, November 1, 2008
We are overwhelmed by the awesome response & support we have received from our family and friends in regards to our tshirts! If you are interested in purchasing a tshirt, please send us an email at firstname.lastname@example.org and we can hook you up :) We are asking for a $20 donation and if you would like us to ship your tshirt to you, we ask for an additional $5 to cover shipping costs. We currently have these shirts in sizes S, M & L. If you would like an XL please send us an email and we can work with getting these shirts made! Again we are so incredibly thankful for your support throughout our journey and we are so thankful that God gave us such an amazing group of family & friends!
Posted by Jamee at 7:16 PM